This Week–I Loose

First of I’m just going to say I’m writing this post from my phone because my laptop is in the living room and I’m in bed completely miserable. So I apologoze for typos. My fingers are swollen 😅

I had all of these plans to post supportive posts for fellow spoonies and talk about how my illness will not defeat me but this week… yeah did not happen. I got a lovely phone call from my doctor and will be going in next week to see a blood specialist and discuss treatment options. They won’t tell me for what exactly but I’m guessing my internist finally found evidence of inflammation and is gonna get her way.

The rhematolgist was convinced its fibro which is bad enough. But my internist thinks it’s still lupus or rheumatoid arthritis maybe even all three (is that even possible?). Won’t know anything concrete till Tuesday so Ima just lay in bed all weekend. Can it be Saturday already?

My sisters will be here this weekend which is good because I need my cuddle buddies.

Its been a rough week. Aside from the obvious chronic illness struggles, Mac broke up with me(I wasn’t upset at all. It was a very mature and reasonable break-up but I was nauseous and wanted to throw up on him anyways), I might very possibly lose the best job I’ve ever had and now I have these weird symptoms that even for me are abnormal. I’m hoping it’s just stress but I live with my dad–a naval medic–and he keeps threatening to take me to the hospital. I’ve cried myself to sleep two nights in a row and slept very little all week. I was unable to call in to work bc we were short handed, so being on my feet doesn’t help.

So this week. My illness is winning. Well done chronic illness–well done. But no worries WildeKats, I am not giving up. Next week is a new week and I have every intention of owning it. And next week I will post more creative writing tidbits 😘😘

I love you all so much.

Oxoxo

Kat

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